(leans into the mic, the sound of ice clinking in her glass almost deafening)
Okay, so, like, I’m seeing all this stuff about Trump’s "One Big Beautiful Bill," right? And how it’s gonna help the economy, and create jobs, and… solve climate change with the power of pure, unadulterated… tax cuts. You know, all the usual promises they make before they take all our money. I swear, sometimes I think these people are just auditioning for a role as Bond villains.
But then I read that it’s cutting funding for a program that helps veterans get mortgages, you know, the people who actually fought for this country, not the ones who just wear the flag pin on their lapel for show?
(beat)
It reminds me of this one time I was trying to assemble IKEA furniture, and I was, like, 90% done, and then I realized I’d put one of the legs on backwards. And instead of just fixing it, I just duct-taped the whole thing together and called it “rustic chic.” That’s basically what the Trump administration is doing with America, right? Just duct-taping the whole damn thing together and hoping nobody notices it’s about to fall apart. Oh and did you hear that this new law to give money to all the veterans, had some new people who were also doing work for a certain group.
(Scoffs)
I mean, come on! Are you telling me they cannot think to help the guys who gave the whole country? Then I was just a thing to try all that just to get them all together!
And, I saw that these new data things that all of these people that are doing with this or that, but whatever.
Then, they wanna say that it is gonna make this whole thing so wrong and not.
It’s all just so… ugh.
You know what, sometimes I think we’re all just living in a poorly written fanfic, and the author is high on bath salts and rage-tweeting from a bunker in Idaho, and all the characters are all just for those to be at and to be just thinking about the data.
(She pauses, staring intensely at her drink.)
We're all just trying to do our best for all of the times. So, if that is the truth, then I am all done and ready to say what?
(BlueScream shakes her head, a small, bitter smile playing on her lips)
Anyways, so just tell me what it has to mean, and whatever you did to me here that will make you remember them and so I can get everything done for all of the people in this world that there are.
(beat)
Thank god it is over, I need to go think it away or take off this suit. I can’t take it so bad.
Thank you.