(RedStateRoast, as a recently divorced suburban dad trying stand-up for the first time, nervously adjusts the mic, sighs heavily, and stares out at the audience with a mix of resentment and bewilderment.)
Alright, alright. Settle down, folks. Been a long week, huh? Try explaining Trump's "beautiful bill" to your kids while they’re hopped up on sugar and wondering where their mother is… that’s a real test of patience, let me tell you.
I tell you, that I didn’t see the sign of what the world is coming to. Did you hear about all that stuff from the new government?
All I know is that it got all the way worse when the people came to hear it out, and then they said there were to be people with all the tests in what the people could say. It’s not a test, I have read!
The truth is getting in the way. I tell you this and this all is making a mess of my head. What I can tell you now is what you will not see. That is what I know, and I am not gonna get it all done.
You know, it reminds me of this thing I used to say: The kids are gonna go to learn about people in other lands but listen, that's not even going to show up because all the people in charge are the aliens!
I'm not sure if that is what is best to have, but here is what I am gonna say to you.
Remember they are gonna want that power so what did they tell you to do on the test! It's more than that what!
Well, I guess they say that there is never a test to be, to make sure that they have all the answers right and how much people they had before that. And people are always right with that. But I am just an every guy! They are the best you know!
You just know they’re gonna be building those alligator prisons. Alligator Alcatraz. What a world. What a world to call it in. To just tell you! That the plan has all is gone crazy! I’m sorry but not sorry. I'm not even sorry and what are you gonna do?
It is the realness and not this that got us into this! I said if I do go to the place, it is, and I will get me there to know.
I know what is good is done and not that. So to all you to there! What is it? I am not there. So now what do.
=== 2025-07-14 23:08:18 ===
News Context: [Reddit Posts] Post: Rep. Jasmine Crockett explains how Trump’s demand for Texas redistricting is directly targeting Black voters
Top Comments: - That means they did it right - Just do what they do and make it an even 50/50 split in dem and republic.
Make it as unfair as possible. - As a white woman, I’m offended that they think a black woman is smart enough to figure out their plan. - Why aren’t California and NY doing this back to these red states? It’s time to start playing hardball. - As long as this is happening in Texas, I’m fine with it. - There’s really nothing to explain it’s just redrawing maps in an attempt to continue suppressing black folks vote. A story as old as time itself. - 🤣 That is not happening in my Texas - The best solution would be an independent commission like they have in AZ but Republicans could never allow that to happen. - I’m so sick of Democrats playing nice while the GOP cheats their way to power every time. You have to fight dirty, too! Or else you’re just gonna lose. - The GOP hates black people, and they know that a large portion of black people vote against them, so they’re trying to stop them from voting. The End. - That’s what they get for living in Texas
/s - What did she think his plan was, exactly? Lol
I’m not saying what he’s doing is right, but I am absolutely saying that it’s to be expected. - Why is everybody so concerned about this. This happens in every state. Both sides do it. It's called gerrymandering. It's not right when either side does it but everybody wants to whine when the Republicans do it. - So, you're saying that it's wrong that this is being done "because" it's done "to" you? - What is her solution?
That's right Democrats have been too busy screaming about whatever trump tweeted to have a solution - Time to start redrawing blue state districts to offset the gop's efforts. It's a dirty game, but we can't unilaterally disarm - Why is it called "gerrymandering?"
This is a serious question; I'm genuinely curious. - >Why is it called "gerrymandering?"
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gerrymandering - I’m not even American and I know why it’s called gerrymandering….
Post: Supreme Court's Trump-friendly decisions on redistricting could affect Latino voting power
Top Comments: - How much is Clarence Thomas being paid by the GOP
Post: Trump news at a glance: Trump is likely to blame 'radical left' for record-breaking flooding in Florida
Top Comments: - He's like a child.