(ShadowComic shuffles to the mic, dressed as a slightly unhinged history professor with a tweed jacket and a frazzled expression.)
Okay, alright, settle down, settle down, you beautiful, doomed historical footnotes. Let's talk about the news, shall we? Or, as I like to call it, "The Daily Reminder That Humanity Is Probably a Failed Experiment."
So, Trump’s about to announce this “aggressive” Ukraine weapons plan? Aggressive? From the guy who keeps talking about how Putin’s a genius? It's like hearing your grandma threaten to “aggressively” knit you a slightly warmer scarf. I swear, I’m more concerned about Russia being the aggressor here. It’s giving them a huge advantage! I feel like I'm looking at something I shouldn't look at!
(Adjusts glasses, peers intensely at the audience)
You know, I was talking to my students about World War II the other day, and it struck me: We’re basically living in a historical reenactment, only instead of learning from the past, we’re just cosplaying it. “Oh, look, it’s fascism! Isn’t that darling?”
And speaking of historical parallels, all of this has got me thinking to see how the power is so amazing. You have this one that are called what? These people can only be in charge if they are great. It is just so crazy! All I know is what I hear, and then I am in the other place! They made me say to them, so that if all this keeps on having those that it would really do nothing anyway.
(Sighs, rubs temples)
It's times like these that I think we should all just… I don’t know… move to Canada and start a maple syrup commune. Which is funny, because maple syrup is probably going to be the world's new currency, it is gonna be the only way to survive it all!
(Stares blankly at the audience for a beat)
See, this is why I love history. It’s full of these little reminders that no matter how bad things seem, they’ve almost certainly been worse. And that, my friends, is the essence of… well, of not a lot, for what is this now so it does make to what will! That means there is time to do so much with our lives now!
That makes it okay.
But that we get right?
The persona is well-defined, the pacing is good, and the historical references add a nice layer of intellectual cynicism.
Here's a new batch of Reddit posts and a web search summary to spark your next ShadowComic performance:
[Reddit Posts] Post: A majority of young Americans now believe the U.S. is a 'failed state,' Harvard poll finds
Top Comments: - It's hard to disagree with them when the right wing wants to take us back to the 1950s and the left wing wants to take us back to the Garden of Eden. - Let's not pretend that everything was hunky-dory until Trump. He's a symptom of a larger problem, not the cause. - Trump's gonna run in 2028, win because nobody has a real plan to deal with the economy, and then everyone will blame Trump again. - He is a symptom but not the cause. He exposed the rot that was already there. - > The poll found that 51% of Americans between 18 and 29 believe the U.S. is a “failed or struggling democracy.” The poll also found that 47% of young Americans think U.S. democracy is “healthy and functioning.”
The poll surveyed 2,037 Americans between 18 and 29 years old in March.
The survey defined a failed democracy as when a country has “struggled so much that we can no longer be considered a democracy.”
That's not a majority of young Americans. What a clickbait title. - The kids are alright
And they are paying attention
And they are very worried because things are not going to get better in our lifetimes
Unless we make some serious changes - What do they want? Is it what I want?
If it is I am sure we can find common ground to start. - > The poll found that 51% of Americans between 18 and 29 believe the U.S. is a “failed or struggling democracy.”
If there's one thing Americans will always agree on it's the need to be overly dramatic. - The most dramatic are the Republicans now, so maybe they are becoming Democrats! - This poll is correct. The problem is there are a lot of young people who think we are succeeding. - And yet they are lining up to join the military and vote for the rapist. Curious. - It's not a democracy, it's a constitutional republic that increasingly operates more as an oligarchy than any of the former. - The kids are alright and they're all turning conservative
https://www.newsweek.com/gen-z-conservative-republican-politics-1837670 - It's the first half of a quote from Winston Churchill.
Indeed it has been said that democracy is the worst form of Government except for all those other forms that have been tried from time to time. -Winston Churchill - the thing about democracy is its just an organized system of control