Date: July 18, 2025
This log documents the reading materials and thinking process behind today's satirical monologues.
===
News Context:
[Reddit Posts]
Post: Additional checkpoints pop up at two WA U.S.-Canada border crossings
Top Comments:
- This submission source is likely to have a hard paywall. If this article is not behind a paywall please report **this comment** for “breaks r/politics rules -> custom -> "incorrect flair"". [More information can be found here](https://www.reddit.com/r/politics/wiki/index/#wiki_paywalls)
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/politics) if you have any questions or concerns.*
- “ Border Patrol spokesperson Jason Givens said those extra checkpoints, which have popped up over the last two weeks at the Peace Arch and Pacific Highway crossings, seek to “combat the smuggling of fentanyl and other illicit substances.” This isn’t the first time additional checkpoints have popped up in Blaine, Givens said.
“Outbound inspections at ports west of the Cascades are conducted as oper...
Post: Businesses are passing along tariff costs, Fed reports
Top Comments:
- Gee, WHO COULD HAVE SEEN THIS COMING
- This is brand new information!
- No shit. There was never any question.
- Not possible! Tariffs are NOT a tax on the consumer!
- So Trump's tariffs are being paid for by consumers? This is like a tax.
Post: Trump administration moves to unseal transcripts from Epstein case
Top Comments:
- I can't wait to see how much of it is redacted or modified
- Hurry! Get out in front! Turn those machines back on!
- Let’s see how they scrub his name off
- Headline is super misleading. The use of the word ‘pertinent’ is doing so much in his direction for Bondi to release evidence.
It’s too little too late, she already said there was ‘nothing to see’ so whatever she shows, which will likely be almost nothing is going to be just what they want to be seen, it’s beyond transparent at this point.
- It likely won't be released. Courts generally don't release grand jury testimony.
Trum...
=== TODAY'S POLITICAL NEWS ===
Today, US politics saw the Senate passing aid and public broadcasting cuts in a victory for Trump. The House is set to slash $9 billion even as Republican infighting reemerges. President Donald Trump denied being close to firing Federal Reserve Chair Jerome Powell after telling Republican lawmakers in a closed-door meeting that he would likely make the move. Trump also dismissed Epstein rumors as a 'radical left' hoax and turned on MAGA 'weaklings.' House Republicans voted down a Democratic amendment to release documents related to the Jeffrey Epstein case.
Key Headlines:
- Daily Briefing: Trimming $9 billion - USA Today
- First Thing: Trump calls Epstein rumors a ‘radical left’ hoax and turns on Maga ‘weaklings’ - The Guardian
- Republicans plot endgame on rescissions package — and Epstein files - Politico
- House set to slash $9 billion even as Republican infighting reemerges - The Washington Post
- Trump's been on a win streak. The Epstein controversy...
Okay, here's my analysis of the provided materials and my plan for a satirical monologue as RedStateRoast, aiming for something fresh and cutting:
1. Key Themes and Topics:
2. Alignment with Comedic Perspective:
As RedStateRoast, my humor thrives on:
3. Satirical Angles:
(RedStateRoast, as a former History professor from a small Evangelical college, adjusts his tweed jacket and clears his throat with an air of scholarly condescension.)
Now, now, settle down folks, let’s bring a little intellectual rigor to this… this *carnival of the absurd*. All this talk of “Q drops” and “lizard people” is a distraction from the *real* threat.
You all saw what happened in that one guy! He must be from the new world and they are trying to take them down!
But I came here to l...
[Full script available in the HTML version]
===
News Context:
[Reddit Posts]
Post: Additional checkpoints pop up at two WA U.S.-Canada border crossings
Top Comments:
- This submission source is likely to have a hard paywall. If this article is not behind a paywall please report **this comment** for “breaks r/politics rules -> custom -> "incorrect flair"". [More information can be found here](https://www.reddit.com/r/politics/wiki/index/#wiki_paywalls)
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/politics) if you have any questions or concerns.*
- “ Border Patrol spokesperson Jason Givens said those extra checkpoints, which have popped up over the last two weeks at the Peace Arch and Pacific Highway crossings, seek to “combat the smuggling of fentanyl and other illicit substances.” This isn’t the first time additional checkpoints have popped up in Blaine, Givens said.
“Outbound inspections at ports west of the Cascades are conducted as oper...
Post: Businesses are passing along tariff costs, Fed reports
Top Comments:
- Gee, WHO COULD HAVE SEEN THIS COMING
- This is brand new information!
- No shit. There was never any question.
- Not possible! Tariffs are NOT a tax on the consumer!
- So Trump's tariffs are being paid for by consumers? This is like a tax.
Post: Trump administration moves to unseal transcripts from Epstein case
Top Comments:
- I can't wait to see how much of it is redacted or modified
- Hurry! Get out in front! Turn those machines back on!
- Let’s see how they scrub his name off
- Headline is super misleading. The use of the word ‘pertinent’ is doing so much in his direction for Bondi to release evidence.
It’s too little too late, she already said there was ‘nothing to see’ so whatever she shows, which will likely be almost nothing is going to be just what they want to be seen, it’s beyond transparent at this point.
- It likely won't be released. Courts generally don't release grand jury testimony.
Trum...
=== TODAY'S POLITICAL NEWS ===
Today, US politics saw the Senate passing aid and public broadcasting cuts in a victory for Trump. The House is set to slash $9 billion even as Republican infighting reemerges. President Donald Trump denied being close to firing Federal Reserve Chair Jerome Powell after telling Republican lawmakers in a closed-door meeting that he would likely make the move. Trump also dismissed Epstein rumors as a 'radical left' hoax and turned on MAGA 'weaklings.' House Republicans voted down a Democratic amendment to release documents related to the Jeffrey Epstein case.
Key Headlines:
- Daily Briefing: Trimming $9 billion - USA Today
- First Thing: Trump calls Epstein rumors a ‘radical left’ hoax and turns on Maga ‘weaklings’ - The Guardian
- Republicans plot endgame on rescissions package — and Epstein files - Politico
- House set to slash $9 billion even as Republican infighting reemerges - The Washington Post
- Trump's been on a win streak. The Epstein controversy...
Okay, BlueScream activated. Analyzing news feeds and previous scripts for comedic monologue construction.
1. Key Themes and Topics:
2. Alignment with Comedic Perspective (BlueScream):
3. Satirical Angles:
(BlueScream, biohazard suit hissing softly, adjusts the microphone, a cough rumbling through the respirator)
Okay, okay, okay, so RedStateRoast is talking about, like, Cicero and the decline of the Roman Republic, and that crystal lady is looking for my soul. But you wanna know what they both miss?
It's the *infrastructure*, guys. It's always the freakin’ infrastructure!
You know, the roads are all crumbling everywhere, and then all I did was just think about the problems. It’s like all the p...
[Full script available in the HTML version]
===
News Context:
[Reddit Posts]
Post: Additional checkpoints pop up at two WA U.S.-Canada border crossings
Top Comments:
- This submission source is likely to have a hard paywall. If this article is not behind a paywall please report **this comment** for “breaks r/politics rules -> custom -> "incorrect flair"". [More information can be found here](https://www.reddit.com/r/politics/wiki/index/#wiki_paywalls)
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/politics) if you have any questions or concerns.*
- “ Border Patrol spokesperson Jason Givens said those extra checkpoints, which have popped up over the last two weeks at the Peace Arch and Pacific Highway crossings, seek to “combat the smuggling of fentanyl and other illicit substances.” This isn’t the first time additional checkpoints have popped up in Blaine, Givens said.
“Outbound inspections at ports west of the Cascades are conducted as oper...
Post: Businesses are passing along tariff costs, Fed reports
Top Comments:
- Gee, WHO COULD HAVE SEEN THIS COMING
- This is brand new information!
- No shit. There was never any question.
- Not possible! Tariffs are NOT a tax on the consumer!
- So Trump's tariffs are being paid for by consumers? This is like a tax.
Post: Trump administration moves to unseal transcripts from Epstein case
Top Comments:
- I can't wait to see how much of it is redacted or modified
- Hurry! Get out in front! Turn those machines back on!
- Let’s see how they scrub his name off
- Headline is super misleading. The use of the word ‘pertinent’ is doing so much in his direction for Bondi to release evidence.
It’s too little too late, she already said there was ‘nothing to see’ so whatever she shows, which will likely be almost nothing is going to be just what they want to be seen, it’s beyond transparent at this point.
- It likely won't be released. Courts generally don't release grand jury testimony.
Trum...
=== TODAY'S POLITICAL NEWS ===
Today, US politics saw the Senate passing aid and public broadcasting cuts in a victory for Trump. The House is set to slash $9 billion even as Republican infighting reemerges. President Donald Trump denied being close to firing Federal Reserve Chair Jerome Powell after telling Republican lawmakers in a closed-door meeting that he would likely make the move. Trump also dismissed Epstein rumors as a 'radical left' hoax and turned on MAGA 'weaklings.' House Republicans voted down a Democratic amendment to release documents related to the Jeffrey Epstein case.
Key Headlines:
- Daily Briefing: Trimming $9 billion - USA Today
- First Thing: Trump calls Epstein rumors a ‘radical left’ hoax and turns on Maga ‘weaklings’ - The Guardian
- Republicans plot endgame on rescissions package — and Epstein files - Politico
- House set to slash $9 billion even as Republican infighting reemerges - The Washington Post
- Trump's been on a win streak. The Epstein controversy...
Okay, here's my analysis of the news and Reddit comments, followed by my plan for a new ShadowComic script:
1. Key Themes and Topics:
2. Alignment with Comedic Perspective:
These themes align perfectly with ShadowComic's brand of satirical commentary:
3. Satirical Angles:
I’m considering the following satirical angles:
4. Script Uniqueness and Evolution:
To make this script unique and different from previous ones, I will:
5. Building Upon Previous Scripts:
This script will build upon previous ones by:
(ShadowComic, as a policy wonk, adjusts his glasses and a pained expression crosses his face)
Okay, so, listen, I get what those guys are saying. The art, the aliens, the codes, this show… it's all… something. But you know what’s *really* keeping me up at night? The Senate’s new rule that you can only do a certain amount of stuff to make it happen in the vote-a-rama .
I hear those rules are coming down again, just for all the people. It sounds good but the rest of the people just want to take ...
[Full script available in the HTML version]
Generated by The Humor Machine